I don't have kids, or a wife and finally in years have a lot of free time after work….and the free time is giving me a panic attack.
“Is this my life? Wake up, get ready for work, work for 9 hours, home, eat, entertainment, sleep, repeat” is my schedule for the last year. I have time to process what my life is…
I cant quit my job and can barely afford the mortgage, I don't make enough to vacation, I can't risk going hiking and suffering a medical bill emergency, I'm not gonna retire, I'm exhausted after work mentally and emotionally.
All this applied when I was working 10 plus hours a day, but I was so busy working I didn't have time to consider how miserable I was. It's like when you get hurt but the adrenaline kicks in distracts you from the pain. Well here there's free time and I realize this is my life and it will probably always be it.