Long story short, I ended up in a restaurant job after getting my bachelor's degree (from a prestigious UK institution) and spending a few years “finding myself”.
I had quite a fast meteoric rise, going from waiter to head sommelier and manager in just over a year (after moving from restaurant to restaurant).
A lot of my rise was facilitated by Brexit, and the exodus of European hospitality workers.
Now, I'm completely burnt out.
I recently accepted a junior position on £45k, the same salary as my role as a head sommelier/manager, with around 10 hours less per week, but I've just e-mailed them to say that I can't do this line of work anymore
It is taking its tole on my physical, and, in turn, mental, wellbeing.
I've tried IT vacancy ads, and admin ads, but nobody reads the application, or responds with a rejection after a month or more.
My CV isn't amazing but, equally, it's not bad either.
I was once the national secretary of a national sports organisation.
I also once worked for a government subcontractor where I had to write the CVs of those that had been unemployed for 2+ years.
LG electronics even awarded me 2nd place in a national HR competition.
Yet, despite this, hundreds of applications have got me nowhere, whilst I can walk into a restaurant job in a 1-2 weeks.
I'm willing to cut my salary in half, but it makes no difference it seems.
Presently, I'm married and live with three women. One of whom is my wife.
They all have the privilege of mostly working from home.
My wife works in an IT role, but I'm the “IT guy”, and have been technologically inclinded since I was a teenager (I'm 33 now). My wife, on the other hand, seems have got the job because:
A) She had one previous IT role in Japan,
and;
B) Speaks Japanese (the company that she now works for specialises in Japanese IT support).
She doesn't, or didn't, even know the basics. Such as what a VPN is, but for them, that doesn't seem to matter.
Sure, her salary is almost half, at £25k, but I'm not even afforded an interview.
I don't resent her for this, but I find it deeply frustrating when, excusing the language skill, I could do her job a lot more proficiently.
Going back to my current role, in-between my trial shift and my first official shift, I found out that a 20-something customer jumped off the balcony, killing himself.
This hasn't reached mainstream media, and the only people posting it as news appear to be Indian, which suggests that one of the Indian barbacks or runners has leaked it.
The restaurant is quite iconic, so the lack of mainstream media coverage dumbfouds me. I only came to know about it when I saw some flowers tied to some railing in a common smoking area, and enquired if somebody had died here. I really didn't expect them to say that it was a few days ago.
In my current mental state, I'm quite apathetic to it all. I have no desire to end my own life, but it makes me question everything even more.
I just want out, and I can't understand why I'm being pigeonholed.