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Antiwork

How do I prepare myself mentally to leave a toxic company?

I've been working for this small company for almost 1.5 years. It's my very first full-time job after graduation, so back then I was really unaware of what's normal and what's not. It's a small company; 3 people in my department (including me), 2 people in the other department, the boss's wife is the one taking care of the HR matters while his daughter is the admin and handling petty cash, so altogether 8 people in the office. I guess my first red flag for this company was when last year, one of the engineers from the other department asked for a raise, then the boss called for a meeting. During the meeting, he was humiliating the engineer in front of all of us and telling him how he doesn't deserve a raise, even brought up the engineer's personal matters like how he shouldn't be living with his girlfriend even…


I've been working for this small company for almost 1.5 years. It's my very first full-time job after graduation, so back then I was really unaware of what's normal and what's not. It's a small company; 3 people in my department (including me), 2 people in the other department, the boss's wife is the one taking care of the HR matters while his daughter is the admin and handling petty cash, so altogether 8 people in the office.

I guess my first red flag for this company was when last year, one of the engineers from the other department asked for a raise, then the boss called for a meeting. During the meeting, he was humiliating the engineer in front of all of us and telling him how he doesn't deserve a raise, even brought up the engineer's personal matters like how he shouldn't be living with his girlfriend even though they're not married?????

Whenever I want to apply for leave/off day, they'd question me about why and where am I going. When I told them that I'll be studying part-time, the boss interrogated me and demanded a reason why I wanted to further my studies. At the end of it all, he said that if I'm studying part-time, my work and the company still come first. A month before my exams, I applied for full-day leave. The day before my first paper, they canceled it and said it was too unproductive for the company. My supervisor could see my screen from where she's sitting and she saw my Whatsapp notifications from my mother and uncle on my screen. After work, she told me “You're not allowed to reply to personal chats during work hours, you can only use Whatsapp if it's pertaining to work.” Apparently, my ex-classmate came to this company for a job interview prior to me joining the company. He asked the boss how's the career progression like here and the boss replied, “If you come every day at 9am and leave at 6pm, you shouldn't expect a raise.” I'm just listing down some of the red flags/things that made me see red. It's to the point where they expect my life to revolve around this company. Honestly, it's making me think that all companies and workplaces are like this.

I'm at the point where I don't think I can take it anymore, long-term wise. I want to quit but I don't know how to mentally prepare myself for it. How do I give a resignation letter? We don't have personal company work emails so if I sent a resignation email, everyone in the office can see it. Plus, in my contract, if I were to resign, it's a 3-month notice. And also, seeing how the boss interrogated and humiliated one of the engineers in front all of us, just because of a raise, I'm pretty sure he'll do the same thing to me too.

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