Just got a new job, left my last job after calling out a total of 9 times in seven months. I work retail, and I'm really good at my job, when I actually show up my manager at my old job didnt say anything about being absent until I was putting in my notice, even then he just said I was a powerhouse when I was there but called out too much.
I had wanted to go at least three months without calling out at this new job (which I already know isnt exactly impressive) but I only made it three weeks before I had to call out due to anxiety and depression.
I wish those were good enough reasons to call out, but unfortunately in the society we have they arent. I dont want to be unreliable and cost myself opportunities, but I find it incredibly difficult to make myself get up and go some days.
I never had a good track record for showing up everyday at school, but I always had good grades so it didnt matter much. Now, I'm in my early twenties and I can recognize A) it's just poorly not to show up when I'm supposed to and B) my bills dont care how good I am at my job if I'm calling out and not being paid.
How do I grow resilience to just show up even when my brain is telling me not to? I'm on medication and working on therapy, so I'm already trying to fix my mental health as much as I can, but what can I do in my daily life to stop being so unreliable?
I feel very lost and hopeless in a society that only cares about production, and I dont want to drown when my adult life only just started, but I just dont know how to force myself to do what I need.
Any advice is welcome, I hope I dont sound like a whiny kid, I'm really trying to figure it all out here with no family or parents to give any help