I’ve been at my company for almost two years now and over the past year I’ve experienced ups and downs on the way I’m treated. My team is very lean compared to the wider division that we sit under and my two “managers” (I directly report into one of them and she directly reports into the other but since I’m the most junior I basically report into both). Those two have been working together for years and are very close. You can imagine what it’s like for someone like me who, is at the associate level, and also hasn’t known them both for that long feels. I am constantly the third wheel, talked down to, teamed up against. Despite being told “we aren’t trying to team up against you”. I’ve been told that I need to “use your brain and think” on projects that I need help on but my manager is not qualified to manage. I know they both talk about me and I just have never really been treated this way at work before. I get so much work and then I feel like they judge me if I haven’t worked on sometning but I feel like their expectations need to be managed. It’s to a point where my anxiety is through the roof despite being on antidepressants, talking with a therapist, and practicing somatic therapy. I even reached out to the girl who was in my role before because they kept bad mouthing her and I wanted to know her experience working under them, since no one else at my company would understand since there is no one vertical to me. She told me everything and how they’re bullies and that they made her life hell that she ended up quitting and told me to get out of there asap. I feel stuck because the job market isn’t so great right now and my field / industry is pretty niche. I was offered a job a few months back but turned it down due to the benefits being less than my current job (health insurance was a big thing for me) and then on top of that my company did a mass layoff which wasn’t handled well and it made a lot of us disrespect them. I saw that they put the job back up but I’m not sure it would be okay for me to reach out and say I changed my mind. I love the people in the office at my current company, though I don’t work directly with any of them, I have made some good friends which I’m grateful for. Anyway, I’m not really sure what to do. I don’t know how much longer I can mentally handle being at this job, I would quit but unfortunately I don’t have enough savings to sustain me for a few months and pay my rent.