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Antiwork

If my previous job had an accurate job posting.

Sales and Marketing Co-ordinator Wanted Tasks include but are not limited to: Social Media manager Marketing manager Campaign coordinator Marketing coordinator Photographer Sourcing analyst Copywriter Website sales assistant Accessories manager Merchandise creation and deployment Loyalty program coordinator Graphic designer Branding Sales associate Cashier Other assigned duties Feelings you may experience: Be prepared to be ignored, dismissed, frantic, anxious, dejected, burdened, railroaded, defeated, delusional, and don't forget, the position may sound executive branch but it absolutely is not in your case. If you experience chest palpitations, extreme fear, or mountains of exacerbated stress, just ignore them and push them to the bottom of the list of tasks assigned to you. You'll be fine. What to expect: Short notice work required. Not considered management in anyway, despite the several managerial roles assigned to you. You will often be taken off task to deal with any one of the other 14+ roles that…


Sales and Marketing Co-ordinator Wanted

Tasks include but are not limited to:

Social Media manager
Marketing manager
Campaign coordinator
Marketing coordinator
Photographer
Sourcing analyst
Copywriter
Website sales assistant
Accessories manager
Merchandise creation and deployment
Loyalty program coordinator
Graphic designer
Branding
Sales associate
Cashier
Other assigned duties

Feelings you may experience:
Be prepared to be ignored, dismissed, frantic, anxious, dejected, burdened, railroaded, defeated, delusional, and don't forget, the position may sound executive branch but it absolutely is not in your case.
If you experience chest palpitations, extreme fear, or mountains of exacerbated stress, just ignore them and push them to the bottom of the list of tasks assigned to you. You'll be fine.

What to expect:
Short notice work required.
Not considered management in anyway, despite the several managerial roles assigned to you.
You will often be taken off task to deal with any one of the other 14+ roles that are expected of you.
You will be stopped at every possible turn in an attempt to impede any and all progress like a sand castle being repeatedly kicked down by the mean kid at the beach because his parents own the beach and he can do whatever he wants and doesn't need to listen to you.
Physical presence required to receive full pay, even if you are completing your tasks at home.
All duties managed outside of 9:00-5:30, Mon-Fri, will not be compensated but expected if required by 'upper management' of which you are not included.
Other tasks as assigned.
Highest of expectations.

This will all take place during a global pandemic where you will live in constant fear of family and friends getting ill and potentially dying.

You may potentially get covid but not know it and may spread it to other people unknowingly. You may suffer extreme pain, dizziness, nausea, lightheadedness, no appetite, and a constant headache that will range from ball peen hammer pushed into your temple to wishing for the sweet silence of death.

But most of all, be creative and have fun! After all, we're a family!

1 person Required
No salary.
No overtime.
No position benefits.
$16/hr

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