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Antiwork

My paycheck doesn’t buy my passion.

TLDR: Manager and GM invited me to a “check-in” yesterday at my office job (been here almost 3 months now). They had some monologues to share regarding my recent performance which were dripping with corporate evangelism and many company-promotional sentiments. By the end of our conversation I was ready to put in my two weeks notice. So I started in my current role (I’ll refer to the company as “Vought”) back in April after a stretch of working part-time since December (graduated college last year). I had been job hunting for a while and the PT gig wasn’t paying the bills, so while I wasn’t at risk of going broke anytime soon, I was eating through my savings and feeling the pressure to land somewhere sooner rather than later. Enter “Vought” — a company that was somewhat related to my industry of choice (events) that I also had a personal…


TLDR: Manager and GM invited me to a “check-in” yesterday at my office job (been here almost 3 months now). They had some monologues to share regarding my recent performance which were dripping with corporate evangelism and many company-promotional sentiments. By the end of our conversation I was ready to put in my two weeks notice.

So I started in my current role (I’ll refer to the company as “Vought”) back in April after a stretch of working part-time since December (graduated college last year). I had been job hunting for a while and the PT gig wasn’t paying the bills, so while I wasn’t at risk of going broke anytime soon, I was eating through my savings and feeling the pressure to land somewhere sooner rather than later.

Enter “Vought” — a company that was somewhat related to my industry of choice (events) that I also had a personal connection to through a friend. The company was hiring for an entry-level role that paid decently for my area but was 95% administrative, data-entry desk work (the exact opposite type of job I was seeking).

However, due to my connection and the industry they operated in, I decided to apply anyway and see if maybe there was more to the role than the job description let on or another role that I would be a better fit for. Made it to the first round interview where (I thought) my hopes were answered! Turns out there’s a role that, in their words, seemed “perfect for someone like me”. And it did sound great — it was active, travel-based, and networking-heavy — it checked all my boxes.

The next THREE ROUNDS of interviews were pretty much only discussing this role. I was excited by the position and, of course, finally finding a full-time position after months of living frugally. After two months of interviews (which seemed ridiculous for basically an entry-level position), I was looking forward to receiving my offer.

Imagine my surprise and disappointment when instead of seeing the role I’d been excited by and expecting, I received an offer for that original data-entry position instead. I was also informed that it would a full year, minimum, before I’d ever be considered for the role I wanted.

With no other hot job leads, financial and parental pressure, and two months of effort, I basically had no choice but to take the offer. I hate the feeling of being “forced” to do something, especially when it came to something as life-dictating as a full-time job, but it solved a lot of issues for me at the time so I decided to give the role a chance.

Well, fast forward three months and it’s everything I feared it would be. Monotonous, repetitive, inane tasks that could be performed by a monkey (no disrespect to my primates) — or more realistically, replaced with AI/technology. Management is also hard-set on keeping us fully in-office, 5 days/week even though we could all be remote workers with little to no change in performance. Some of my coworkers even have hour+ commutes (LA).

However, while my passion for the role is nonexistent, I still perform my duties to the best of my ability as I don’t want to throw away a positive reference. I also have no trouble making friends and believe(d) myself to be on good terms with my co-workers. I will admit that my lack of passion does bleed through in my attitude towards the job, but I never let that impact the quality of my work or relationships with others.

Despite this, one of my managers and our GM called me in for a “check-in” meeting yesterday and I had suspicions that my passion/attitude would be their topic of conversation. I won’t recount the entire (40-minute) meeting, but here are some highlights:

  • They admitted/agreed that I did great work and had “no complaints regarding my performance” or personality/relationships with coworkers.

  • They acknowledged that the role I was offered was not the one I was initially excited by and all but promised.

  • They said the reason for the meeting was due to my attitude towards the role I didn’t want. Apparently my coworkers noticed my frustration and distaste for the monotony of repetitive, soul-sucking data entry.

  • Finally (and this was the cherry on top), they used choice phrases like “we’re a family here” and “we want you to live and breathe Vought” and “when one team member isn’t passionate about their work, the whole team is affected”.

  • They ended with insinuating that if things didn’t improve, my future at the company would be in question.

Yeah sorry but that’s bullshit. If I’m adequately performing my all job duties and maintaining a positive relationship with all coworkers, then I have earned my paycheck and should not warrant any “check-in” talk. My paycheck doesn’t buy my passion, especially considering all the context leading up to this point.

I have already taken steps to change my situation — started a side hustle as well as a separate part-time role to help with bills and have been applying to/interviewing for other full-time jobs that won’t make me feel like I’m a hamster on a wheel. As soon as these steps are developed enough to make a smooth transition (hopefully within the next couple weeks), I will be quitting Vought and never looking back.

I hope others in my position can find the same drive and opportunity to change their circumstances — nobody should feel like they’re stuck on the hamster wheel. We all have value and passion that shouldn’t be compromised, especially in the name of “company culture”.

Thanks for the read and would love to hear from others who can sympathize.

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