I fled several abusive relationships in my life and in some cases lost everything.
My current job has been very triggering to me because of the way I’ve been treated made me realise it’s in the same way as these past toxic relationships and the trauma they left. So it has been re-opening old wounds and triggers.
I find it depressing that people often tell you to just take whatever at work, have no/poor boundaries or just ignore people, but would never tell you to do the same in a toxic or abusive relationship outside of work. And the fact many are just stuck at work feeling powerless (because just ignoring does feel ultimately powerless still) just fuels this acceptance and continuation of abuse. The more you internalise, the more it’s harder to recognise, have standards, boundaries and fight, and repeat. I’m personally scared of just becoming a corporate zombie that is just unquestionably made to accept this, or just give up the fight through exhaustion and dispassion.
I know it’s part of capitalism, and part of the fight we have with older generations that they had to suffer, so we must all have to too. I saw how miserable my parents were at work, and how they took it out on us, and as a child saw how toxic workplaces were. I just wish I knew more what to do to feel not only more empowered myself not to get trapped in these toxic abusive work situations, but also the bigger picture of helping more people, and building healthier work environments with healthier boundaries and expectations.