I (20) have worked many part time jobs since I was 16. I always worked food industry jobs and since I worked and saved in high school, I never had to work full time at one of those jobs. Now I work my first non food service job (an auto maintenance corporation). For various reasons including moving out of my parents house, my saving have dwindled and I’m now basically living paycheck to paycheck, which means I’ve had to work full-time over summer to afford rent. I get financial help for school which helps me pay rent during the academic year. But working full time has proven to be way more difficult than I was expecting, and it has me kinda worried about the future.
Now I will say, my future career will be graphic design, which is something I’m way more passionate about than cars (I do like a cars tho, at least more than food service). But if that falls through for whatever reason, I did think working on cars would be a good backup. I struggle with mental health (generalized anxiety disorder, I’m medicated but it’s still pretty bad, plus depression), and working all day and then going home, going to sleep, and waking up and going back to work has been proving to be so menial and disheartening. Not to mention my job keeps me on my feet, hot, and sweaty all day with little down time most days. I also have a family history of fibromyalgia, and I’ve been wondering if that may have anything to do with how physically taxing this has been. Luckily, I go back to school in a couple weeks, so there is a light at the end of the tunnel. But I worry that working so much of any job will destroy what passion I may have for the work.
All my other coworkers do this all the time, and they seem fine. I wonder if I am just lazy and/or entitled. Within the first month of working full time, I pulled a muscle in my lower back that was so painful it put me out of work for a week (I was hunching over when I left from work the day it happened). That also caused a new temporary numbness and pain in my hand that happens when sitting reclined or asleep in certain positions. I worry about my coworkers thinking of me in a negative light, but many days I think about running my car off the road on my way home just so I won’t have to go to work tomorrow. I know that sounds bad, but I enjoy the work itself way more than anything else. It’s the hours and the constant low morale in my workplace that get to me, along with the constant exhaustion.
Anyway, I think I’ve vented enough. I posted this partially to get it off my chest, but I also wanted to know if anyone else has had a similar experience. Does it get easier?