Month: October 2022

I’ve been thinking of suicide and been thinking about doing it at work. I’m a teacher. No family, not married, estranged from my parents and siblings. Nobody to leave behind. I have so much on my plate work wise. I am suspicious that an AP program I built up over 8 years is going to be taken away from me. I’m doing an extracurricular class this year, and I’m a glorified pencil pusher. The kids teach it themselves. I have a standard class that for the life of me I can’t inspire those kids to save my life. I tutor tons on the weekend. I’m write items for the exam. I’m lonely, overwhelmed, and have called EAP so many times that I can identify different operators. I’ve got a shrink who prescribes this and that. A well meaning hippy therapist. I am not a good person, at least I didn’t…

And it’s not. It’s never for my safety. They look at me like a switch could be flipped at any moment and I could fly off the handle. I came out with this disability 2.5 years into a job and suddenly they are sending me to doctors, claiming they fear for the kids, etc. I was the model employee and when I’m triggered I’m get scared and sad. It’s happened at plasma centers, BioLife, for donating (in honor of a student no less). At no point did they ask if the things in the location could be my trigger. I just get fired or deferred.

Post PhD I found myself getting repeatedly rejected for jobs. “Won't you get bored?” was the politest response. I ended up changing careers to IT which at the time didn't care as much. I used to park in the city. The old guy who took care of the lot was Russian. I'd stop and chat. Turns out he did his Doctorate in Plasma Physics. Car park attendant. Plasma Physics. I have no words.

TL;DR Constantly being busy is getting me depressed Work. College. Dishes. Laundry. Meal prep. General tidying the house. Random things that life throws at your cause fuck you, that's why. I'll just start this off by saying that I know tike can always be managed better. But at what cost?I can spend an entire day off finding things to do that are productive. But it's my day off. I shouldn't have to. But I do. Because there's always things that need to be done. This week for example, I had soemthing come up that took up my entire Sunday almost. Sunday is normally meal prep day, Maybe a load of laundry or cleaning surfaces. Plus the dishes that I use to cook the entire weeks lunches/some dinners. Monday was my day off, but as my Sunday was mostly consumed with a sudden unpredictable matter, I only meal prepped some of…

I've always wondered why most people's resume starts with them entering university. Why capitalists insist on very short resumes. What if resumes started at the moment of their birth? What do you think it would reveal? Perhaps the rich got there because they had the best education, environment, nutrition, tutoring and connections since birth? What would it reveal about your struggles? Your thoughts?

I’ve been working at a grocery store for 6 months and ever since then I’ve been having a conflict with a certain coworker who has a very negative attitude towards me for no reason. Most times we don’t speak to each other but whenever I need help and she’s the only one available to help , she’s always very rude about it and makes sly remarks. Apparently, I found out she is also rude to customers as well and also other coworkers had reported her rude attitude to management but nothing was done about it. We recently got into an argument while at work over some things and she tried to demean me in front of a customer. Out of anger I filed a complaint to corporate/HR thinking it would be anonymous because I felt that if I reported it to the store managers nothing would’ve been done and in…

I tried asking this on a privacy tech related sub and it was quickly removed, compounding my impression they are probably bad people employed by companies that I should be wary of – so let’s try here. They are being unusually evasive about what they collect. I’m in financials, so this is something of a fact of life but most companies I’ve worked for had a sheet for their collection program that said something like “it collects posts and messages” to stop, you from say, doing insider trading. Smarsh told me they don’t want their competitors to know what it does when I called them, ask your admin, lol. I mean, going forward I’ll act as though I assume it could get everything of my future activity but I’d be curious of what it’s potentially getting that it shouldn’t for it’s stated purpose.