I feel hopeless and burnt out. Does every job suck? Does work (especially new ones) make people anxious or is there something wrong with me? If it doesn't suck in one way it'll suck in another and if you get another job it'll also suck in a different way but be good in a different way.
So for the past 5 years I've been working at the same company and it was pretty okay for the first two but now I've hit burnout and everyone sucks and I hate my life and I'm chronically stressed, cranky, or resentful. So for the past year I've been working a series of other jobs as well as this one just to see if I can find something else to do that doesn't make me want to kill myself.
Well I've had four other jobs one of them was a call center one of them was a server one of them was a sandwich maker and the one I'm currently at I just started being a swim instructor for kids.
Every time I start a new job I either realize that it's terrible for example the call center job sounded fun super easy to sit there and answer phones I love calling but after a month and I was throwing up every day because of anxiety so that didn't work..
The server job fired me for no reason and I never told me why and I also had extreme anxiety there, the sandwich shop I quit because it was full of lazy loud annoying stupid teenagers but it only gave me a little anxiety and this new job with kids (I literally haven't had one day of training yet but I just finished the onboarding) its very okay but the GM is being very confusing about how training and pay works so that makes me frustrated / nervous and I have a bad memory when anxious (like when interviewing or asking hard questions like so) so asking for a 3rd time is gonna make me look dumb. Anyways..
Seems like every job just sucks. Idk how I've managed to last where I am now for 5 years. Why can't I find an experience similar to this current job? It also sounds fun and exciting Every time i get a new job but then I get hired and freak out and doubt myself and ask why am I doing this? And I doubt it because every job I've ever had besides my current one and I've had like 4 others just SUCKS and makes me ANXIOUS. I can't believe I have to do this for the rest of my life. Jump between crappy jobs wondering if I'm good enough/wasting my time/making the right choice. I'm tired.