I tagged this NSFW due to the foul language contained in my story.
Any way what was the most petty complaint you have received or overheard from your authority figures?
I used to work with a manager [Billy] with an extremely sensitive nose. Every time he went to the restroom he would suddenly stop in his tracks and pull his shirt over his nose. He would often give dirty looks to the next person that came out of the stall. Billy also apparently had a Hank Hill like urethra which made his urination take ages.
One time after using the restroom I opened the stall and Billy was standing there with his shirt over his nose. He screamed in anger, “DELICIOUS GRAND 7300! DID YOU MAKE CACA IN HERE?!? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO IN HERE?!? IT SMELLS FUCKING BAD IN HERE MAN!…”. I lost track at the rest of his rant since I sidestepped him, washed my hands, and left the restroom as he was still screaming.
A few months later a forklift driver [Johnny] and I were loading a truck and he relayed a similar tale to me. Johnny was in the restroom and he heard a loud noise. Billy was screaming into the radio to call the supervisor [Eddie] to the restroom. Billy asked Eddie “WHO THE FUCK PARKED THEIR FORKLIFT HERE?!? WHO IS IN THIS DAMN RESTROOM?!?”. Johnny finishes using the restroom and he sees Billy cringe. Billy started screaming, “FUCKING SHIT MAN! WHAT DID YOU EAT MAN!”, Johnny replied “that's not nice. That smell is caca not flowers. What do you expect?”. Billy and Eddie run out; Billy returns with a can of Lisol repeatedly screaming, “SPRAY IN HERE!!!”
PS. Johnny was fired shortly after this after Billy told the COO that Johnny just loves to argue. Johnny was one of our best forklift drivers.
The warehouse crew later retaliated against Billy. Every time one of us went for a dump we would report to Billy that there was a maintenance issue in the restroom; he fell for it every time. I took it upon myself to start eating rare steaks, with garlic, spinach, a can of corn, and prune juice.
Around the same time one of the truckers developed a digestive issue which rendered the restroom unusable for at least two hours. Again Billy had to investigate the frequent “maintenance” issues every time one of us reported it.