I work at a non profit that does a lot of great work. We send out meals to different companies that have contracted us to feed their clients, largely those in transitional housing or in behavioral health facilities. We also run a program that trains those who face barriers to employment master skills that will make getting a job easier. It's really rewarding in a lot of ways.
Seven months ago I started on as a prep cook. It was really difficult getting the hang of things because of a lack of organization and procedures. My sous chef didn't actually train me and he became a huge issue due to his lack of self awareness, his lack of effort or support and leadership, and basically just not doing any work. I became so incensed by his bullshit that I was moved into the kitchen and began working as a cook alongside our other one cook. The person who initially did most of my training was also a prep cook – someone who had been there for two years and really knew the ins and outs. Both this prep cook and the sous chef were fired within a week of each other, leaving only two prep cooks on the team as well as me and my co-cook.
At this time the program we run had to be paused as well because the program instructor quit. My co-cook ended up getting the job so when the program started back up again last month it was just me upstairs with two prep cooks doing the work. We also had an operations manager who was very hands off but knew allllll the things about production…but they had stored it all in their head – stuff that wasn't well documented, or documented at all. Our recipe book is out of date, our par sheet is out of date….most things were out of date and the correct information was stored in the brain of our operations manager. Because I was directly under the operations manager I was taking in a lot of this information and trying to keep track of what I could.
When my co-cook went to work as program instructor I was given the title of sous chef. Again at this time the production team consisted of me and two not very experienced prep cooks – a team of three for what usually takes a team of 7 or 8.
Things were already really rough but then the operations manager said they had to go to a work conference for a week, that they'd be back for a week after the conference at which point they'd also be training a new production manager, and that then they were taking a month long vacation.
When they left for that first week the production team got demolished. All the info we needed we didn't have access to. The information that should have been accessible got on the plane and left inside the brain of our operations manager. Though I was in charge I wasn't given access to our documents, I didn't have access to communications with our clients, I didn't even have a key to the building.
I had multiple meetings with our executive director basically saying “yo this is fucked, we shouldn't be in this position, and also give us more money.” (I had previously had luck getting everyone a bonus during a different time when we were understaffed).
I guess upper management had no clue how bad things were in production. They helped us how the could (not very well) and when my operations manager got back from the conference…they were fired.
So now here I am with the most knowledge in this place – THE ONLY ONE STILL ON THE PRODUCTION TEAM FROM WHEN I FIRST STARTED -, training and guiding my superiors as they try to get a handle on this shit show. I am essentially running the place – I just hired three people to finally fill out the team and I got my team raises. We have a huge menu that nobody but me knows, nobody but me knows what where when and how…
And I'm just so tired and pissed. I didn't get a raise which does fucking suck but mostly I'm just pissed at the position I'm in. I'm NOT cut out for this. I have NEVER been in management. I am barely worthy of being the cook, much less chef, much less this “sous chef” position that's really the operations manager position at this point. But somehow I have our executive director, our operations director, our newly hired manager, and all the production team depending on me, flooding me with requests for clarifications and help. Not gonna lie I'm doing a great job considering, and my production team trusts me and I advocate for them hard.
The clincher is…I'm a single mom and this job allows me THE PERFECT, CUSTOM FIT schedule that I need for my co parenting schedule. Like, there's no other job that would be so flexible – my kid is legit allowed to hang out in the space for a couple of hours a week. If I were to quit this job I would see my kid less, I wouldn't be able to work as many hours, and it'd be a whole ripple effect with the schedules of my co parent.
If I walked out production would shut down and the organization would lose a shit ton of money. I'm bitter and stressed.