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Antiwork

Long closing shift at understaffed small cafe. No social life. Want to quit, hard to justify it.

(Crossposted from r/work because didn't receive any response there.) I've been at this cafe for 5 ish months. Let it be clear that in that span of time, everyone who joined was super kind and friendly and amazing to work with. It's also a small speciality business that sells chocolate, in-house baked goods, and espresso/chocolate drinks. Very fun and unique for me to learn about when I switched over from a third wave small cafe. I didn't even interview for the job. I was brought there to hang out by a customer from the cafe I used to work at. I joked about being available if they ever needed a helping hand, the overworked, older female owner said they always need help, and the customer I was with said she'd forward my number. and bam, I was suddenly there. I just went with it, I wanted to learn something new…


(Crossposted from r/work because didn't receive any response there.)

I've been at this cafe for 5 ish months. Let it be clear that in that span of time, everyone who joined was super kind and friendly and amazing to work with. It's also a small speciality business that sells chocolate, in-house baked goods, and espresso/chocolate drinks. Very fun and unique for me to learn about when I switched over from a third wave small cafe.

I didn't even interview for the job. I was brought there to hang out by a customer from the cafe I used to work at. I joked about being available if they ever needed a helping hand, the overworked, older female owner said they always need help, and the customer I was with said she'd forward my number. and bam, I was suddenly there. I just went with it, I wanted to learn something new and the environment at my old cafe was also getting toxic with coworkers who didn't pull their weight.

Immediately I was delegated to closing. That wasn't so bad when I wasn't attending college. The closing shifts typically go from 12pm-9ish, and on weekends? 1pm to 9:45pm. It's not an understatement to say that this has wrecked my social life, which I admittedly don't have a lot of, but I consider what I do have to be vital.

Even more so since I have chronic health issues, physical/mental, and since I have largely gone no contact with the majority of my family. So my very small support network of friends and a couple family members are typically available in the afternoon/evening. Since I became full time at this cafe, I was rarely able to dee my remaining family before she went off to 4 year uni. I wasn't even able to spend time with her or say goodbye in the couple months before she left because I was so damn busy at this place.

I wasn't prepared to be so needed here. There used to be 6 people at this cafe. It went down to 5 when the girl I was closing with suddenly quit. Last month a coworker made a move to another state, and now we're down to just 3 including me as of last week because another indefinitely stopped working here due to school, mental health, and personal life. It's always been the case that the owner has constantly pitched in and handled the cafe, being there from open to close on many days (she lives in one of the apartments above the cafe). Which is fine, and she is very sweet and cares dearly for her employees. But she always finds qualms to pick about the way things are done. I've been taught various things from various people, one of the kids was particularly misinformed about how certain recipes are made, so I had to correct that and even as a pretty good barista, I've been micromanaged and told this/that — only for her to realise that at the end, I had been about to do the right thing. And not to mention I'm somewhat bothered when she comes down to finish off a close with me, and is slamming things and curt because she's tired/stressed. I know the burden, but I'm tired, too. Things are overexplained in the daily list, with every basic bullet point being expanded upon, but somehow vital/updated information is missing and the employees catch slack for not knowing. I've mostly escaped this due to being new and picking up things/relearning from the owner without arguing, but it's still irritating.

I recently started college again online, a full load online because I'm 24 and need to finally start getting on track to finishing community college. I don't have aspirations of being a barista forever. I want to go to medical school or get into psych work. This seemed to only stress the owner out more since my fellow coworker who left recently was also in this situation.

I was holding onto these qualms, especially since I love working at this place. I'd vent to my friends during my lunch break about being stressed and annoyed, but then I'd take my daily medication and perk up afterwards, dismissing it all as “just unmedicated irritation”.

The real breaking point is that I just started a weekend job a few weeks ago at a bagel place. Now, looking at both jobs, I'm floored at the difference. Being at this new place, the most time anyone is expected to be there is 6am-3pm. The wage is about more than 18/hr, but tips are 10/hr. Obviously that is diminished a little by the fact that the hours are slightly less, but what was amazing to me was experiencing a fully staffed, organised workplace. I barely had to be told anything to pick up on almost 100% of the job by my second weekend opening/closing.

And then, after that, I went home and enjoyed time with my friends. Did my homework. I actually DID MY LAUNDRY after weeks of miserably putting it off because the laundromat would be closed when I was off work at the cafe. And I was able to finally think about how good being a morning person treats me, because if left to a closing schedule, I will try to “reclaim” my time by staying up late, then waking up at noon for work. I actually got to spend time with my support network, function as a normal human being, and have a great experience in an organised workplace.

My dilemma now is that the manager at the bagel place has offered me the chance to become semi-permanent and eventually permanent, since they'd have to hire for a new person once two people leave the bagel place to move. She likes the way I work, and she also knew me from being a customer at my old cafe. The difference is that I actually got a formal, organised interview here. I want to take it because the work is awesome and the staff/money are great… but most positions go into 1:30pm, conflicting with when I'm usually expected to be at my current place.

I am considering leaving, but feel awful about letting the staff continue to shrink. They'd be down to the owner, manager, and baker if I leave — there is one new person who interviewed and will train, but I don't know the state of that yet. I also feel bad because the owner of my current cafe matched my wage from my other cafe, which was 18ish, right when I transferred over. (I was shocked later on to learn that previous coworkers were getting paid 16-something.) The cafe is infinitely smaller, though the bagel place is also a small business, but is growing to the point it has a factory and two locations currently.

I'm considering working this week and the next that I've been scheduled at my cafe, but reaching out to the bagel manager to see what she can offer for me schedule wise. And also to reach out to my coworker who recently took an indefinite break to see how they are coping having been away for a bit.

What is the right move? is a highly subjective question. But any advice anyone has, having read my situation, is super appreciated.

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