I've been at my current place for almost a year now. At first it seemed like a pretty chill place. Most people had been there for years and seemed to like it. And I thought I had a nice place I could really shine at. If only I had known.
I had a long sit down with my manager yesterday, basically going over shared frustrations. One of my chief complaints was that I never got adequate training for my current duties. Before I started them I had asked my manager if I was going to be trained. Twice I asked him. And both times he said yes. Said training never took place. Been winging it ever since. When I brought that up in our meeting he basically responded that I should have asked again.
Another thing we talked about is how I am too slow at a certain task. This has been brought up several times since a month after I started. Each time I ask for any targets or recommendations on how to get faster. Every time I've been met with some variation of “well, it's been a long time since I've done it, I just know I did it faster than you; you're the slowest one on the team” Finally brought it up again yesterday and was told they are working on putting metrics on place at some point, until then I need to just better. I asked for any particular tips or strategies I could try to improve. All he told me was that “Well, not everyone works the same. Things I might suggest might not work for you.”
Ending the meeting with telling him I want to be good at my job, just work with me here. His response “I am working with you by not writing you up.” And the made insinuations about my work ethic because good work ethic is choosing to be fast. Then ending the meeting by telling me he is here to help and support me in my job, and it is his job to make sure I have all the tools I need to do my job. I can always come talk to him about anything. (Somehow I didn't feel it worth it to mention how my two leads have been sabotaging me and trying to get me fired for months.)
I admit, I'm not a rock star employee, quite average at best. And there are some things I need to improve on. That said, it feels like I'm being told to walk a cliff while having smoke blown across the way. How am I supposed to improve at my job if I'm not given objective goals to work towards?
Anyway, that's the end of my rant.