Just curious on people’s take on this: my boss is actually quite nice, but with the lead up of this national meeting coming soon he’s been very distant (unlike him with the lead up of a big meeting) and incredibly critical of my work.
Now I’ll be the first to admit that with deadlines looming and this big meet I also have to attend, I really haven’t been able to give my work the usual dedication and attention I’d normally would. I’m torn between multiple tasks, some are professionally personal tasks, such as ensuring I have both the time and the resources to complete mandatory training, and team orientated tasks that would ensure the smooth sailing of my department. Essentially, I’m the only one who can do my job and I have no real cover between co-workers with the exception of my manager. With everything going on, things are slipping through the cracks because of imposed deadlines from my manager on things that do absolutely need done, but equally I’ve been made to feel inadequate at my job or the work im producing because im making silly mistakes under this pressure.
I don’t quite know how to handle it all.
My manager has organised a meeting with me next week to discuss my working approach in the office (we’re normally working from home) and I just have the absolute fear in me; so much so that Im finding it really hard to switch off after working hours and even spending this time typing up this post instead of sleeping. On Tuesday, when this all came to the surface, I literally spent a couple hours writing down my raw and visceral emotional responses to the events that led up to the feedback and meeting request. Ive imagined being super upfront with these events at the meeting next week, because the events that were perceived wasn’t what happened. I’ve even reached out to my union for advice, because I am actually afraid.
I guess my fear comes from the fact that I respect my manager enough that I feel like I’ve let him down, while equally he’s criticised me enough for me to actually give a shit about something I’ve done wrong under extremely stressful circumstances.
This hasn’t been my best working week for a long while and I’m having trouble switching off. Any advice?