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Antiwork

Am I over analyzing or does my boss really hates me?

This post is quite lengthy, and I apologize for taking up your time. If you do take the time to read, then I am genuinely grateful and honored to have your attention. Here we go – ​ A few instances where it seems evident to me that my boss has resentment towards me: • He never wanted to promote me to a manager role. I request it at every review. He says I'm not ready. It wasn't until the CEO recognized all my achievements (which I diligently documented) that he was prompted to advance me. • He failed to acknowledge my promotion, offer congratulations, or discuss it with me in any manner. Essentially, he merely handed me the letter to read over, inquire if I was accepting the offer, “Are you sure about this?” and sign it. There was a lack of enthusiasm in his demeanor. When others at the…


This post is quite lengthy, and I apologize for taking up your time. If you do take the time to read, then I am genuinely grateful and honored to have your attention. Here we go –

A few instances where it seems evident to me that my boss has resentment towards me:

• He never wanted to promote me to a manager role. I request it at every review. He says I'm not ready. It wasn't until the CEO recognized all my achievements (which I diligently documented) that he was prompted to advance me.

• He failed to acknowledge my promotion, offer congratulations, or discuss it with me in any manner. Essentially, he merely handed me the letter to read over, inquire if I was accepting the offer, “Are you sure about this?” and sign it. There was a lack of enthusiasm in his demeanor. When others at the office receive promotions, he creates a considerable fuss, even going so far as to purchase lunch and cake to celebrate.

• Upon requesting a trip to accrue my CPE credit, he demanded a comprehensive record of everything I would learn at the conference. While this seemed reasonable at first, upon my return to the office, he insisted I provide a detailed breakdown of what was pertinent to our business and what was not. This was followed by a brief justification for each relevant point, detailing how and why it was relevant to our business and how I planned to implement it. This level of reporting was unheard of in my experience with CPE courses. Having complied, I sent him the document via email around eight months ago, to which he has yet to respond. When I queried my colleagues about, no one ever had to do such thing after attending a conference.

• Whenever I ask for vacation time, he retorts with a barrage of irrelevant questions, none of which pertain to my vacation except for my return date (which I clearly stated in my request). He then asks me to document my daily responsibilities, logins, passwords, and procedures for carrying out my job. This is followed by a mandate to train team members to handle my tasks in my absence, supposedly to ensure backup availability. His responses to others' vacation requests are noticeably more relaxed and enthusiastic. With me, it feels like he's piling on additional work and instilling guilt for taking vacation time. He enjoys discussing vacations with others but remains silent upon my return.

• I had been coordinating with a contractor to upgrade a machine in the office. After I presented the quote for approval, he insisted that I travel 25 miles to the showroom to demo the machine in person, despite me having already conducted a comprehensive virtual demo. When I voiced this, he remained adamant, refusing to sign the quote otherwise. This requirement was unusual, as even the contractor attested that our company has never visited their showroom. What irritates me is that he doesn't operate the machine, nor does he possess any knowledge of its workings.

• He often insists I pose impossible requests to contractors. Sometimes I'm already aware of the responses due to their logical nature, yet he remains unconvinced, unnecessarily complicating things and straining my relationships with these contractors.

• There are tasks within his capabilities that he will wait for me to accomplish. For example, downloading a report from a website. He'll send me his credentials, I'll log in, wait for him to text the multi-factor authentication code, download the report, and then email it to him. All these steps could easily be carried out by him, but he refuses. Despite offering to guide him, his response is always, “I don't have time for that.” I wish I could retort, “I'm not your bitch.”

• In company meetings, where department managers highlight achievements and announcements form their team, he never acknowledges my accomplishments or bring up anything about me.

• Other situations can't be disclosed due to privacy and security concerns.

Additional subtleties:

– His responses are extremely understated, often bordering on passive-aggression.

– His micromanagement is excessive.

– His methods of retaliation are difficult to articulate without seeming paranoid, as they are often subtle and seemingly unintentional.

– He rarely includes me in significant discussions or projects unless his superior requests my presence, yet he'll involve members from other departments who lack relevance to the discussion.

– His tendency to force me into overtime is blatant. He's aware of my shift timings, yet he'll come into my office just minutes before my departure with urgent tasks, compelling me to stay back. This has become a frequent occurrence.

– He scrutinizes my work excessively. Each minor detail, whether it's an error or not, is questioned, which consistently undermines my competency.

– He displays willful ignorance – often feigning lack of knowledge or playing dumb in situations where he should be accountable.

– Overwhelming, tedious, and least desirable assignments invariably land on my desk when there are other people in the department for those jobs.

– His public criticism and questioning of my work, often creating a scene, is both humiliating and unwarranted.

Why do I continue working here despite these difficulties?

– He doesn't own the company.

– I enjoy working with my colleagues.

– I love the tasks I perform.

– A single individual isn't going to ruin my experience.

– My compensation is quite good.

– The benefits package is excellent.

I suspect my boss hired me under the impression that I was obedient and submissive. Initially, I adhered to his directives, but as I gained a deeper understanding of the company, I began challenging many of his decisions, proving him wrong on multiple occasions and asking a lot of questions. Despite the challenges, our department has performed well, consistently meeting budgetary requirements, improving processes, and modernizing our workforce since I started. People at the company praise me for make their life better at work. Now, unable to find a valid reason to let me go, he's resorted to making my work life challenging out of sheer frustration or jealousy or something – I don't know. I now keep records of everything with him just in case something of legal proportion transpires.

What are your thoughts? Have you had a similar experience?

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