I have been late a handful of times, mostly 15 minutes, but a couple of 45 minute late arrival times. Honestly, I was just not feeling the job. I work with troubled kids and one of them sliced her wrist in front of me. The kids are sometimes rude and waking up to that can be hard. But trust me, I know that the response with the most leverage behind it is: this is your job, you do what you gotta do, this is what you signed up for, and you can always walk away. A lot of times, this feels like a mentally manipulative response because, of course, you “can” walk away, but the it's not the results of that will always work out for you, and I have been looking for another job, but I don't want to quit. I want the conditions to be better. It is a good job. And one of the ways the conditions could be better is if my employer would approach me as if he understands as opposed to approaching me like a boss and saying things like “this is a business” and “money is time”. I feel so worthless, honestly, and used. I feel like a cog. I feel invisible and not valued.
For the record, I am a millennial, and I live with that guilt. I know my generation feels entitled, that we use the trauma of having Gen X “parents” (i.e. children who had kids) to justify not coming to work and instead following our heart. And I feel genuinely bad for the boomers who had to walk 6 miles, two ways to get to school as a kid. I just can't keep up. I need more me time. More time to sleep. And need a slower-moving job because, as I said, I can't keep up. I'm not built for the war time. I'm not built for that.
So, personally, I think he should say, “You know what? You're doing a good job. I'm sorry you couldn't get in here on time. Is there anything we can do to assist you?” And be genuine about it.
I think the hardest part is knowing they will patronize my belief that I deserve more, but never actually give.