Just quit my job without another lined up.
Been working at my current workplace for two years, during which I was passed on for a promotion this summer.
Instead of leaving, I let my boss' boss' boss convince me to accept an extra responsibility, where I am lent out in the afternoons to a different department for 6 months. Took it because it paid 15% more (negotiated that from 10, but wanted 20%).
During this discussion, when I asked how this would benefit my career, she told me that usually, if the assignment proves to be successful, there is a raise in grade as well.
I did not enjoy part of the tasks in the extra job, and even when my manager told me it could end early (end of Nov) I told her I would honour my agreement with that team. That team loves me. The manager of that team consistently gives me positive feedback and I am 100% sure they will give me a stellar review.
(Wish I could work with them, but I do not enjoy that field of work, they do not have positions in my desired field and do not provide visas, they're in the UK, I'm in continental Europe.)
On Friday my manager scheduled a meeting to dicuss my career after these 6 months of extra responsibility, for Tuesday. I was anxious the entire weekend, (absolutely diabolical of her to schedule this meeting with the weekend in-between and take the day off on Monday) but since it was her delivering the news, not the department head, I suspected it won't be good news.
During this meeting she asked me whether I could get involved in a project I used to work on before the 6 months (it's a shared service centre inbox/case handling type thing) come January.
This made me believe I am not getting a promotion, I am not getting the project management position I have so clearly indicated in countless meetings that I am seeking. When I asked abt the grade and pay thing (for which ofc there is no paper trail) she asserted to not know anything abt this but assumed it would be only in the case in which the responsibility is continued past the 6mo.
This afternoon at 430 I took my first break of the day (other than one for slicing oranges to dry for a company event I am organising because I like going the extra mile when I act like a clown), laid on the bed and was both trying to cry for release and trying not to, thinking it's not so bad. So I got up and asked my manager whether she has a minute and told her I quit. I had been hinting at this, and no efforts were made frm the company's side other than telling me they put my name on some talent list and took it to the HQ in NY.
What compelled me to quit was feeling unappreciated and that I was regressing. My part of Europe is has been affected by the geo-political situation and inflation has hit hard. My rent is going up by 33% come this December. Bottom line, since I started working here my quality of life has decreased
This year I got a Scrum Master Certification, a Google Project Manager Certification and a Uipath (automation) one but the fact that my current employer does not value my skills or my effort makes me feel so insecure!
I make abt 1100 EUR/mo in my current position, the past 5mo I made 1300 thanks to the extra responsibility. I never eat out, only buy second hand, etc., etc..I'm single and don't have children or pets and will afford rent and bills for 6 months thanks to my savings but I am absolutely panicking right now.
At the same time I feel like I owe it to myself to ask for more from life, because I am doing everything “correctly” but atm I would not even be eligible for a 30-mortgage for a 10sq m apartment! I am in my early 30s, I have two MAs and 7 years of corporate experience but fiscally I am not viable. This seems insane to me. It seems like I must change something!
I am absolutely panicking right now.
I am extremely risk-averse because I come from Eastern European poverty and now my dead-end job doesn't seem so bad. Unfortunately, I am a proud person so I would never ask for the job back so all I can do now is apply for other jobs.
I spent the last 8h browsing LinkedIn, found 40 jobs and put them in a spreadsheet. Applied to two already.
The worst thing is that I have to attend an in-person half day training tomorrow. No, that's not the worst thing! The worst thing is that I am so scared and don't trust myself with the decision I made. 🙁
And then I think:
Slow-quitting isn't my style. I prefer a clean, honest break. Time to focus on my job search. I genuinely could not stand doing a poor job at work while I apply for other positions, sneaking out to interviews etc. That's just dishonourable.
And then I panic again.
And then I think abt how ppl say job searches are a numbers game, 40 vacancies does not seem enough. Also from working in HR I know that at last 1/2 are spoken for and advertised just to give the impression of a fair chance (N 2 obey the law). I dnt live in America, and while I am a EU citizen, there's less mobility or employers ask you to already be in a certain location, there are language requirements so statistically, one's chances are lower.
For the past 10h I've been feeling like I did good to leave and then feeling like I just ruined my life and it will take me years to recover frm this.
Help