My neurodivergent / veteran self is affecting me at work and I am frustrated. There is some social game I am missing that I am expected to understand and I get “punished” for not playing.
I just want to fucking work without having to not hurt people's feelings by being black and white or standing up for myself when someone tries to take credit for my work, or misunderstands me, or tells me one thing and I'm expected to understand the other.
I was asked if I needed to be shown something. I said no and explained how to do it to show I knew. If I ask a specific question, and I get the answer, I say thank you and leave. If someone.starts explaining something not related to my question, I clarify my questions and ask only for that information. If I ask for help, I somehow don't know my job. If I don't ask for help from senior people, I somehow and not working to learn.
I ask senior team members for feedback and I get told I'm doing well but my boss hears otherwise.
He told me an issue the other day was that I was offered to be shown something and I said no, I have done it before and know it, but thank you. Apparently that was a rhetorical question.
I am over it. I am here to do my job and go home. I make mistakes and can accept that, but I finally noticed a pattern of bullshit.
I am sitting down with my manager to go over this professionally and filed paperwork with HR for a hostile work environment, along with emails, to have a paper trail.
I respect my supervisor and manager and I think they will try to help, even if they don't understand.
Funnily enough, I work with two other veterans and we don't like each other personally but we actually work the best together out of anyone.
It is literally that simple.