Basically, I (29f) quit a toxic research lab 2 years ago. Mainly due to the head honcho of the lab being a racist, elitist, histrionic personality disorder having, maniac that has no respect for anyone but herself. Let's call her Marjorie because why not.
Worked for Marjorie as an undergrad intern, was snubbed for a full time position for a year after graduation, until they needed a replacement for the person they hired (a fellow recent college grad at that time). I was finally hired and was of course paid in peanuts, had to work another job to make ends meet. But it was a career job, so I wanted to “pay my dues.” I was so wrong.
Marjorie took advantage and expected me to work even on my official days off, constantly derailed any plans or work we've discussed for our research projects and actively worked to exclude me in publications in research I contributed to in both conducting the research and drafting publications.
She would also question why I haven't gotten a masters when a fellow colleague the same age as me did. I would be snubbed for meaningful conference trips and presentations of the work i contributed for that more educated colleague she would compare me to. She wore me down with her microagression, racist and elitist comments and actions over the years. I volunteered hundreds of hours in the span of less than 2 years, fought tooth and nail to get opportunities to learn as I was boxed into a role I wasn't even hired for. I lost the most weight I've ever lost in my life, developed a neurological condition of unknown etiology and have irrevocably damaged my relationships with food and substances. I had to withstand her weird touching and offensive comments towards minority team members like myself or the research participants we work with. I swear, once during a conference I organized she touched my thigh and whispered so close to my ear her lips were on my ear. She didn't even realize my disgust or that I was just frozen in my seat. It definitely ruined the rest of my week.
Nonetheless, I found the love of my life while working for that hell creature and we both quit as soon as we were able to line up better paying jobs with better working environments. We even stayed as contractors to help transition our replacements, which she also abused and we both had to terminate our contracts with her prematurely. She had no respect for our time and effort, treated us like her little rare Pokémon creatures or some shit. She “collected” our team based our “diversity” without even understanding what it means to work with a diverse group of people or how to behave apprioriately in front of people of different socioeconomic and racial/ethnic backgrounds.
Here is the fun part, Marjorie emailed me last week with an essay about how she's doing and the work she needs from me and how I need to give my availability in the two weeks since her own team is very busy. With one sentence at the end, “would love to hear more about how everything is going.” No specifics on pay either or how much time this would require. I went into white hot rage and I felt sick. It just reminded of the nasty taste She left in both me and my partner's life. Things I am still working to recover from. I hate entitled and clueless people like this.