I was a construction worker for 25 years. Asphalt. For the last 9 years at a company that was great to work at for the first 5. The owner really took care of us, great money and work life balance. The owner built the company from the ground up. Could run any machine and do any job on site, knew every aspect and could do it all. He knew what it was like to work really long hours, which is the norm for the industry, he did his best to not work his guys to burnout levels, we would work 45 to 50 hours a week.He was getting older and wanted to take a step back so he “sold” the company to his son. His intentions were to protect the company and the workers rather than sell out to a bigger company so they could pick it apart like a vulture. The son came in, never having worked in the industry or doing any job in the field. It was ok for a while, but then he decided he wanted to build an empire. The hours started to creep up, it was regularly in the 70s a week when I decided it was too much. He hired a slavedriver from another company to increase production. I had some family reasons (mothers mild dementia) to take a step back. I tried to work out a deal with the son where I would work 40 to 50 hours a week but he said he couldn't have anyone working “part time” so I moved on. Thats the back story. Now to the funny.
The guy they put in my place is a raging alcoholic and drug user. One of the worst aspects of working in that industry is the lack of a bathroom when you need it. I have shit in the woods, in dumpsters, behind buildings, in alleys, in the beds of dumptrucks, in buckets. Sometimes there's just no bathroom, and if you have to go, you have to go. For a alcoholic and coke user, especially when your dealer cuts with baby laxative, thats a problem.
A couple weeks ago, they were paving right next door to their main industry competition. They decided they were going to put on a show. They made sure every piece of equipment, trucks, and any tools were power washed and sparkling clean. They set up a catering company to come, set up tables and serve BBQ to the guys, they got there early and started to work.
About 10am, the alcoholic has an emergency case of the bubbleguts. He starts waddling over to the competitions shop, holding his ass, screaming “where's the bathroom!!!” He has his pants halfway down and his dick hanging out before he gets to the bathroom door. How do I know this you ask? The competition has it on camera from their security system. 15 minutes later, he exits. 10 minutes later the competitions owner comes out and is looking for the Forman. It turns out that the alcoholic didn't quite make it. There is shit all over the toilet and even on the wall. Forman is pissed, calls alcoholic over to apologize and makes him go over and clean it up.
Imo, you couldn't devise a better plan to embarrass your company. I just wanted to share this because I can't stop laughing about it.