I'm suicidal. I was passively suicidal for a while, but now, I've been fantasizing about it because the world is falling apart. Work is a HUGE trigger for me, but I struggle horribly to get employed, and I'd rather die than be homeless. I also have pets to take care of. Busy season is mandatory. Normally, I work 10 hours, 4 days a week. During busy season, we work 11 hours 5 days a week. I need access to weed if I'm going to stand a CHANCE at survival. It's illegal where I live. I don't care, though. It's a stupid law that only hurts people. I'm rambling…