I’ve always been good at making physical things. I studied art in college to become a professional artist, but I never had any success making money with it and have worked in manufacturing for years to pay the bills. With lots of literal sweat, blood, and tears, I’ve advanced along the way, to the point where I’m more so using my mind on a computer rather than breaking my body down doing physical work, but I still only make about 40k a year. My wages have gone up over the years but along side inflation, it’s always been just enough to pay the bills.
Meanwhile, my friend works in IT in the big city and just landed a 100k a year job. I’ve never seen him stress about work, and heard him talk about how relaxed it is, and the hobbies he does on the clock with all the down time. I’m happy for him, he’s a great guy and knows his skills but at the same time, I can’t help but think whyyyyyy? He’s suggested I switch industries, but I have no idea where to begin, my mind draws a blank when I begin to think about it. I’m introverted and not charismatic, I struggle with certain things like math.
I’ll also hear successful notable people, or my favorite artists speak on podcasts sometimes say things like “life isn’t all about work. People need to relax. I love spending afternoons going for long walks”, things like that. But here I am, struggling just to get all my chores done and get to bed on time when I get home from work, exhausted. How do they make it sound so easy??? I don’t even really make art anymore, I’ll go on a hike a couple times a month so that I don’t go crazy.
I know I need to find a way out of my situation, but what do I do with these feelings of jealousy and bitterness? I try to remind myself that I am very lucky for the things I do have, that comparison is the thief of joy, but it’s still hard.