(English isn't my first language, and putting NSFW just in case because of some phrases)
I will celebrate my 10 years working today. 10 years without any guilty pleasure or vacation because I can't afford it. I have already done everything to limit my expenses and have even called a financial advisor. The problem comes from the salary (I'm close to the minimum wage), and also from the fact that I live alone without a partner. All my couple friends are doing better than me for similar salaries and bigger loans. Inflation worsened my situation.
I have two diplomas in logistics and trade. I became quite savvy in IT, and I am so passionate about QHSE that I knew standards and regulations better than the QHSE manager in one of the company I used to work for. I learn quickly and have always given everything at work. I'm open for anything, can manage my time for work and do extra hours fine. However, I can't get a job that pays more than the minimal wage, when I've been sending CVs every week for more than 2 years without interruption.
I have also never managed to evolve inside a company. I saw coworkers getting promotions when they got hired way after me and would keep getting blames. I even stayed 4 years in a company that screwed up my health because they made me the promise to make me become a foreman (which I've always dreamed of because in my country it means a better pay with responsibilities), to finally tell me to sit on any possibility of evolution.
Today I have a job where the atmosphere is great, I love my colleagues and my boss, but the job is underqualified, pays badly without benefits because I haven't managed to find something better. I spend 80% of my time on recruitment websites, Reddit or on my phone. Despite the good environment of my job, I'm not doing well because I struggle financially and I cry almost every day. My mental health is at its lowest and it's creating me health issues. I can't even do sport anymore because I'm not eating properly and thus drowned last time I went swimming.
I don't know what to do anymore to improve my quality of life. It hurts seeing people I know easily getting jobs that pay 3 times better than mine when they don't even try nor have diplomas. I'm digusted seeing that my efforts don't pay up. I don't want to be at the bottom of the ladder anymore. I tell myself that I failed my life and that I fxcked up in the choice of my studies. I'm planning to xff myself because I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
If you started out as a minimum wage worker and now are a manager or in a position that pays you decently, how did you manage to climb the ladder without having a ton crxp of diplomas or a family member at the head of the company?
Also if you have advice of any kind even if it's just to stand out on the CV or the cover letter, I'm interested.
Thank you for reading my novel, i'm sending you all antiworkers good karma and luck in your lives.