I’m having some complicated feelings with a job I will be starting soon. The starting pay is above what I earn now and there are several 20k bonuses as you complete training over the next few years. In 3-5 years, my pay will put me in the top 20% of US household earnings (excluding my spouse’s income). On top of all of this, there is incredible insurance that covers pretty much everything. The retirement is amazing too. I am 28. I can retire after 20 years and have to retire at 56. This isn’t even to mention that it is a job I will actually enjoy (I know that is almost a non-existent concept in this sub but it’s how I feel).
The problem is that even as I am typing this, I feel like I am bragging and showing off. I have busted my ass to try to build a decent life and career for my family. I get angry when the government and employers do things that hurt employees. I agree with most every negative employment sentiment in this sub. Every talk about changing retirement, stagnant wages, rising healthcare costs pisses me off and I want to be part of the radical change.
While I am definitely taking this opportunity and looking forward to it, I am afraid I will lose this part of me. I feel like rising up in the system of capitalism is going to corrupt me because this job basically means that I “won.” I don’t have to fight anymore. I don’t have to be angry since a lot of these negative things won’t affect me as much.
The work will be hard but I will be able to cover all of my needs and the vast majority of my wants. This is more than I ever thought I could ask for. I am afraid that if something happens like the government tries to raise the retirement from 65 to 67, instead as being as pissed as the French (as I would be now), maybe I could shrug it off because it doesn’t apply to me. I don’t think I would do that. That isn’t me. I want to be angry when there are injustices. But what if I stop caring? I am afraid that I am being put into a tower and won’t feel as attached to the people below that I used to be part of.
Has anyone felt this way before? Any advice to stay humble and not lose myself?