This week I go meet the CEO of a company that has pretty much hired me. I feel like I'm about to give my life away to a company that I should be a direct competitor to. I need the job and would be unwise not to accept, but a part of me truly feels like I'm giving up. If I share this with someone close to me, they'll tell me about gratitude and that I should be more positive. I'm open to having a poor mentality on this, but they're not open to seeing my perspective which is this new opportunity is only going to take up my time, possibly be another lateral move disguised as progress and pay me a fraction of what I could earn. Last year I was supposed to kill it, then I got really sick. Now, I've made a complete turnaround in my health, but lost everything in the process. I'm sorry for ranting and not really having all of the words, but I have all the feels and I'm too old to be going through this still. Just wanted to get some of this off my chest. I can't shake the feeling that working for them is not going to get me any closer to my life's work and don't want to end up like almost everyone I know who still wishes they made different decisions.