Late twenties female, been landscaping on and off for many years, and I have been with the same company for two years. Decent bosses, I make $21 an hour and live within my means but I am still struggling/living paycheck to paycheck and I simply cannot keep up anymore.
I suffer from PCOS, which made me develop pre diabetes. I also have severe ptsd from chronic homelessness/no support systems and being a victim of several forms of abuse.
Despite being healthy and active, going to the gym after work sometimes, I have noticed an extreme decline in my ability to even function regularly at work. My body is giving out on me at only 26. I am burnt out. I feel hopeless because my “savings” is slowly draining.
I live within my means and there is nothing more I can cut from my spending aside from going to the laundromat twice a month instead of once a week. Or maybe dropping my gym membership. But I need it to keep myself sane, if and when I end up homeless again I will need it to keep myself clean.
I cannot even afford to fix my truck anymore & I worry that I will have to sell it. But also if I end up homeless I kindof need that to live in. But I can't live in it if I cannot afford to keep it registered, insured, and operational.
I called out today because my pcos is causing me extreme pain, lethargy. And my boss made me dig trenches in the pouring rain while he just watched the entire time.
I dont own a rain jacket. Cant afford one, wasnt offered one. I feel awful and sick today from 4 hours of manual labor while it poured outside and I got all muddy. We usually dont even work in the rain so the fact that my boss made me do that felt like “punishment” for me calling out a lot last week due to illness/my medication and body making me sick.
I am tempted to just give up entirley because there is no point in trying anymore. I have no family. I have no support. But I don't want to end up in a homeless shelter again where I will be beaten, robbed, and SA'd again.
I don't do drugs. Don't spend much on anything. Its not fair.