I feel like I have been in survival mode for my entire adult life. I will be 34 next month, I started college right before the 2008 collapse and then had to drop out and start working.
I pieced together a degree doing college part time while working full time. I cut every cost I could, juggled which bills I could let go past due. I got there eventually, got the luxury of only have 40-50 hours a week.
I still lived modestly but I at least I could say I had more money coming in than going out. Then the industry I was working in was decimated in the pandemic.
I found new work, but it payed worse and I had to move to a place that cost more, more belt tightening. Then my rent was raised less than 5 months later by over $100 and the math got harder. I could still do it, but I would have to be careful, keep an eye out for new work or new apartments or both.
Now with student loans starting back up I find myself where I was a decade ago, working a second job, typing drafts of this post up between doing doordash orders so I can maybe get safe tires before winter really sets in.
I am just so tired, I don't want lavish, I would just like to not need to use a food bank. Like I said, at the top, I am just kinda posting through it,typing this up has a certain catharsis to it. I am taking steps to find new work, re budget, and relocate.