I've been trying to process my thoughts and emotions regarding this meeting earlier with the CEO of the new job I was just offered. Long story short, I was referred to this position by a good friend and though the type of work wasn't anything to get me too excited, I was thankful to have finally gotten a decent job offer after 2-3 interviews. It was remote as well, which is exactly what I was looking for.
Well, the day I was said to start had to be delayed a few days, because I had a family emergency with having to rush my mother to the ER. She has always been relatively healthy for her age, but she was then admitted to the hospital given that she had a stroke. She was discharged and everything was seemingly well, until it wasn't and I had to rush my mom to the ER a second time. I understand the frustration from the employers perspective in regards to the awful timing of my family emergency. I had made it really clear to my perspective boss that I was willing to start my work as soon as the emergency was over, but he insisted “let's us hold off until your mother is more stable”. I agreed that might be the best idea, as to not have any other emergency arise and to start the position on the right foot.
Well, today was the day we checked-in with one another and here I was thinking it was going to be just a making sure things were good enough to move forward with the job duties. Just to be talked down to in such a condescending and unprofessional manner. He made slights at how he has employees with five children, and that THEY still show up to work and that “work comes first” for them type of attitude, as to make an example of me and my mom having a stroke, as “these things happen, but I need to know that this isn't going to keep happening”. I bit my tongue, as I understood the frustration and the not knowing me personally yet (and well, really needing the job right now). I made it clear that I am always professional and communicative in any job, and that my work ethic is not reflected with how this emergency derailed my original start dates. I thought things would be fine after this. But nope – he proceeded to talk about some scheduling concerns. He had asked me to propose to him a work schedule of my own, given that I was coming on as a contractor and not an employee. He didn't like the schedule I proposed, and said that he wanted it to be the schedule he wanted, or nothing. I said I could try and accommodate that the first month, but that as a part-time contractor, that I would “illegally” be working as a misclassified contractor. I wasn't even going to bring this up, but the fact that he was such a jerk about my family emergency, I stood my ground, though respectfully and with complete understanding that this was a job I had been referred to by a friend, and I didn't want to leave a sour taste in their mouth regarding the person who referred me).
Then it became hostile and argumentative on his end. He insisted in knowing why I couldn't just accept the job as he was proposing (though it was completely not what he had offered in the first few interviews) he had mentioned 20-30 hours per week, contractor to employee, flexible and that he just prefer I have a lose schedule to connect with others on the team during business hours, all of which I agreed to. The offer was now discreetly changed to 20 hours a week, contractor only, and on HIS proposed schedule only. I've had many contractor jobs in the past in this field that laid me off when their budget didn't afford me anymore and then I would have zero unemployment benefits while I searched for another job, so I was adamant about wanting to be an employee if he was satisfied with my work after the one month. To end it all, he was incredibly persistent that I tell him why I wanted to even be an employee and his tone became so aggressive – that I told him in a kind manner that this position might not be the best fit and that I would not want to waste any of our time any further. He persisted again and almost threatened me “You can't come back from this ______, we talk now or you can't come back from this.” It's like I dodged a major bullet, but also I'm so shook up and exhausted. As if my family's health emergency wasn't enough of a blow this last week, this was the icing on the cake. I made sure to thank him for his time and to please be understanding that this ordeal isn't a reflection of my friend who referred me, but that it is simply not a good fit for me.
I think I just need to vent and get some validation that I dodged a bullet right? I am respectful and a hard-worker, but I do not tolerate being humiliated and treated like a child by a NEW job nonetheless. Also, my friend that referred me completely backed me up and understands my reasoning for ending things the way I did.