Three months ago I started subbing which turned into full time. My new school has a food pantry that is available to students and teachers except no one really uses it so it’s always overflowing. I’m basically rebuilding my life from ground zero after my soon to be ex husband left me at the hospital during my stillborn delivery. His parents were our landlord who owned the house and they removed all of my belongings including my cat while I was still in the hospital. I have no help and no support. Feel free to read my post history for more info. I live in an apartment that is too expensive for me to afford but it is the only available place that has security on premise, which I need. I'm saying all of this to explain why I don’t have money for food. I get $45 a month in food stamps. The food banks in my area are closed by the time I get off work and the ones that are open on the weekend are hard to get to on foot.
On Friday (11/3) I was feeling extremely light headed so I went to the school's pantry to grab something. When I walked in the librarian was chatting with another teacher and said “Oh you are back AGAIN?”. Heavy on the “again” as if I’m there everyday or something. I've only gotten something two other times and I already was feeling like shit but this made me instantly feel guilty like I was taking food out of a student's mouth. I just smiled and started looking through the pantry items to find something that was a less popular item that was close to expiring. I grabbed a can of tuna and crackers. I was writing a message in the “thank you “ book when the librarian started shaking the donation jar that is kept at her desk. I put in my last $2 even though I didn’t have to. These donations come from the PTA fundraisers and I swear there is so much food available. I can’t express how absolutely mortified I was walking back to my room.
I received an email from the admin basically saying someone reported me for overusing the pantry. Admin recommended I come in during my planning period tomorrow to basically go over my budget to see what I can do so I can support myself. Obviously this was said more professionally but I cut out the bullshit to translate. This was not coming from a place of genuine concern. I have no problem with trauma dumping to strangers on the internet but I don't want to have to explain my private problems to anyone I work with. Again, the food pantry is for both teachers and students.
I decided against bringing in my bills so that admin could go through my personal life as I found that very invasive. I did however have a short meeting about the fact that the donations are for both teachers and students and how lucky we all are that people are helping. I did contact my union rep but on November 8th it was announced that the school pantry will only be available to students and the pantry will remain locked.
When I checked the “thank you” book I was the last person who utilized the pantry in nearly a week. All of that food is no doubt going to expire and I’m so angry. I guess teachers don’t need or get help since all my local pantries are only open when I’m working. Absolutely disgusting to gate keep food and then complain about teacher shortages. Signed a starving teacher.