For context I am horribly depressed and have tried to commit the un-alive twice. My job has been so stressful on me that I’ve had to change some of my medications to help. As a result of the side effects it can make me really air-headed and forgetful. I was written up for a few of my mistakes which I accepted because it really was my fault. However, my manager recommended I get off my depression medication to be a better employee because she doesn’t believe in them. She says I should try holistic stuff until I feel better.I’m not sure what to do anymore. I feel so lost. I’ve applied for jobs in hopes of getting an out because I can’t afford to quit outright, and I’d feel terrible for my team who are nice enough to put up with my mistakes. I need this medication to even barely function like a normal person. I can’t believe she would say that to me knowing my situation. I feel so unlucky and don’t know how to get any better at being an adult.