Note: My original Reddit account was tied to my old workplace, so I made a new one.
This might be a little long but here goes, I wanted to share my story somehwere:
I am nearly 3 months out of my old workplace. I was doing a work exchange (I lived where I worked, with 11 other people including my bosses). I stayed at the place for nearly three years.
Now, some work exchanges are pretty great if the owners have actual culture and work exchange at heart. However, in my situation, I was dealing with shady bosses who used a “community” of artists and economically vulnerable people to run a business without properly compensating them.
Back in August of 2020, I answered an ad for a “Live-in writer/editor.” At the time I was living with family. It was during the pandemic, and I actually wasn’t looking for a new place, but I found the ad.
I can live in my dream city for free? How amazing! I thought. WRONG!
Back in the ‘90s and early 2000s my bosses (a married couple) had a brief stint with fame because they had a special on a major cable channel. Previous to that, my bosses were on public access.
During that time period, they made millions from their specials and coinciding phone s*x business. So… yes, the business I ended up working for also operates a phone s*x business, and they’ve done this for over 30 years. Additionally, they produced a show with p*rn stars, artists, scholars, models, wannabes… etc. They also threw wild parties after these shows and have thousands of hours of footage. And before you ask, everyone who came through the building had to sign release forms.
So to run the phone business and show, my bosses created this community of live-in employees. I guess it was a sweet deal for some back in the day. Think about it: Weekly parties, free food, gorgeous ladies (and people in general), a prime location… They hired people to multitask as phone business receptionists as well as show producers, editors, photographers, office assistants, etc.
However, as my bosses’ popularity waned, changes in the adult entertainment industry occurred, and as numerous lawsuits and financial troubles eclipsed the business, things changed. They never really let go of their glory days and continued to persist with this “show” despite its nonexistent audience and their shaky finances.
Fast-forward to 2020, and I entered the picture during COVID. Gone were the days of yore.
My bosses’ business had relocated to a quieter side of town, and also due to the pandemic, in-person events had ceased. I never knew those wild party days, but some of my housemates did, including a guy I’d go on to be involved with. He’d lived there for 10 years and is still there. He is the same age as me (30), but he started working for my bosses when he was 20 years old and a fresh college dropout. More on my relationship with him later…
Even though I thought the opportunity was too good to be true, I answered the ad anyway and sent my writing samples. Later on, I talked with a nice office manager. I did an edit test, and a phone interview, and then was asked to come in person to meet the bosses and my future coworkers/housemates. I got the job. Initially, I felt welcomed and was excited to be part of a community. I had my own room, access to free food, and new friends. Then I realized things were messed up pretty fast.
I had to work 6 days a week, 4 hours a day (so, 24 hours of work, which I agreed to). Didn’t mind at first until I realized that the couple liked to do a podcast EVERY Saturday night that we were mandated to be in attendance for… which brought my work total to 27.5 hours. On top of that, the turnover was so high, and when we were short-staffed, we had to work extra hours, bringing the total to nearly 30 hours a week. Additionally, my bosses always required us to work holidays. Time off was allowed very infrequently and mostly just in the case of family emergencies. Since I was an editor, my female boss always HAD to have a blog ready by Monday evening, so I had to do my edits late Sunday nights. She was absolutely rigid and couldn't have this any other way. I could never really have weekends off.
Although this was advertised as an ideal place to work on my own stuff, it was clear that the bosses only wanted people to work for them 24/7. They didn’t care about or encourage outside work and complained if there were any scheduling conflicts.
Meanwhile, I got a job at an adult industry publication. It was remote and didn't interfere with my work hours. Unfortunately, this publication released a negative story about my bosses about 25 years ago. Threatened, my male boss created an NDA for the first time in the company's history. I was forced to sign an NDA because I supposedly worked for a “competing company.” Mind you, I was approached by this publication first. I didn't know about the story that exposed them.
And here’s more that came up over my time: Almost everyone who left was fired or quit on bad terms. The zoning is also strange for the building, and when people were fired, instead of being allowed a proper notice to leave, my bosses would sometimes try to push people out immediately and say, “Well this is a commercial building, so you don’t live here,” in order to justify kicking people out and not going through proper tenant laws.
I’ve seen the male boss snap at numerous people, and scream and call them names when they contested him or fell out of favor with him. To spite people, he threatens to sue and in some cases has sued them, and has even called one of my ex-coworker’s former workplaces. For sure, I knew my boss never liked me. I even overheard him calling me a “fuckhead.”
The couple that runs the business has no idea what they’re truly doing, especially the man. They always want to hire the best of the best, but end up never listening to them. We all ended up doing stupid vanity projects that didn’t lead to anything.
Additionally, I made a mistake and was involved with one of my housemates/coworkers. My male boss blamed me for my boyfriend’s inability to keep up with his work, and would constantly insinuate that I needed to leave (because they didn't like couples), but since they really needed my boyfriend, who does technical/website work for them, I was “allowed” to stay even though it was “against the rules.”
We were never out in the open, but my boss has security cameras that showed when we left the house, and in places like the kitchen, so he could see us hanging out or making food. After a while, I was often afraid to cook because the boss would often conveniently be in the kitchen when we were.
And even worse, my now ex-boyfriend was just as bad as the bosses. Since he'd been there for 10 years, he also picked up a lot of toxic behaviors… and turns out the bosses enabled him and his alcohol addiction and mistreatment of women. He tended to cycle with all the various hires over the years, so much so that it was a running joke. He was cute and charming so I didn't heed the warnings. Also due to his addiction, two days before I left, he got too drunk and harmed me. I told the bosses later… and they did nothing and in fact tried to blame me, claiming I was… warned. Following my departure, he purposely withheld some of my belongings, ghosted me, and also refused to finish a website I paid him for. He also started sleeping with one of my ex-coworkers/housemates less than a month after I left (and was doing this while I was begging for my things back). My bosses know he did this as well.
Why did I stay so long? Once I quit my food service job for this place, it took me a bit to stabilize with my freelance work, and due to COVID and debts, I struggled to save money. Not to mention the scheduling of the place I worked prevented me from getting a full job on the side. My publication job paid decently, so that helped.
So, for over a year, I worked 7 days a week to save money to move out. I was afraid to tell my family about what was happening. The good thing (one of the few) was that I had lovely coworkers/housemates that I’ve grown really close with. They made the work bearable, so the experience wasn’t all terrible. And they were all supportive of my exit.
After saving up enough money, and getting everything together, I finally quit. I feel like I need therapy after all this. I gained weight due to stress, and an irregular schedule, and my skin still looks awful. Not to mention, I’ve developed other health issues due to the insane amount of anxiety I’ve gone through. Luckily, I moved out of state, have my remote job still, and live somewhere I feel some semblance of peace. I finally told my family, and they have been supportive.