So, I work in corporate communications. Not exactly my dream but one of the best things you can get with my background (excellent university degree in humanities and languages). I actually also do not despise the work, it’s quite diverse, I work together with many different departments, different projects, and so on. However, I am no here for almost for years and I figured that there is no chance for self-improvement and development. The projects repeat themselves each year and you basically cannot learn anything new. It get boring and frustrating. Furthermore, the company does not really care about their employees. There are some “pseudo” events like a health day but there are basically no benefits (had to fight for new chairs for several years) and it is hard to impossible to get a pay rise.
That’s all not that great but the worst part are basically most of my colleagues in our department. The biggest problem is the one person I closely work together with (the two of us basically are our own sub department) and she always wants to talk about her feelings. If there is too much work, she says “I am insecure now. I can not do it.” If there is little work, she says: “I am insecure now. I feel excluded and not integrated.” We had a huge fight in the past. She complained I do not give her all information I have (basically she wants me to point out to her which e-mails are important) and said one time I told her to put me in cc in an e-mail, that made her really insecure and question our relationship, I wouldn’t trust her. One time I really snapped, I could not keep up with this BS anymore. We had a lot of talks and I said multiple times I just want to get the work done in good quality and that’s it. I have no personal connection to what we actually do here. But I had to sit through hours and hours of talks.
One colleague was even crazier and was the first in the history of the company who managed to get herself fired (not officially, but basically yes). These people are unable to handle the simplest things. When it was employee’s birthday we usually would organize a breakfast for them which would involve planning weeks (!) ahead. There would be a WA group formed and everybody had to say what they brought to the table (literally), then this was discussed. Once I got a private message at 11 pm. why I only planned to bring hummus and not a second item. Then at the special occasion, we would all awkwardly stand around the breakfast table and realize we have nothing to talk about. “Do you feel older now?” Cringe asf. Needless to say, my important family festivities always “coincide” with the annual summer party and so on. What a pity 😉
These are only small examples, I’d rather not mention the “big issues”.
Of course, I made the decision more than a year ago to leave the company. I know it will not get better, only worse and nothing will change that. I have now sent close to a hundred applications and all unsuccessful. I got to a second-round interview at my dream job but lost to another candidate. I really put myself together again and again to write applications, but never turns out well. Financially, I cannot afford to just quit. And now I am stuck here. At the moment, there is furthermore incredible low amount of workload which kind of even makes it worse. I sit and sit and wait until the day is over. It really affects my mental health. I do not want to be here and it is all so useless.