I’m 42, and in the last 10 years or so, I haven’t held a job for longer than a year and a half. Some jobs I lost (brewery worker, lab technician, quality inspector), some I had to leave (lab technician again, teacher). It’s great trying to sugarcoat that your mental health isn’t great and it bleeds over into work. I’m so sick of having to start over every few years. And with my physical health getting just as bad as my mental health, I can’t afford to temp. No insurance, no sick time, no thank you.
But now it looks like I’m going to lose this job too. I was put on a PIP a couple months ago and we’re coming up on the end of it. Despite my best efforts, it’s not going well. So I’ll probably be out on my ass by Labor Day, if not sooner. I’m not very marketable, I’m just as replaceable as a bad battery. All I see is losing my home, my car, what little health I do have, until I’m asking for change with a cardboard sign. I genuinely don’t want to stick around for it. I don’t have a family or any pets, so there’s nothing to stop me from killing myself. I had a good few months there, but I need to do it before I become a burden again. I’m sure I’ll be missed for a while, but enough time will pass. Anything’s better than another job that doesn’t pay enough and takes too much time.