Content note: discussion of death
So I (39F) work in retail, and customers will often ask how I am. Usually I tell them fine or good or whatever, even if I'm feeling sad like after my breakup in November. Well, Saturday, yesterday, and today (I did not work Sunday or Monday), I was telling customers who asked I'm NOT okay, and I was telling them why. The reason is that my grandmother may die in the next couple days.
My one boss didn't like that. Now, this is a boss who I really like. He's normally very kind to people in the sense that he sticks up for people who need it. Tonight? Tonight he scolded me for telling people how I was truly feeling. He said it was completely inappropriate, and I quite frankly don't agree. I can think of a lot of things that have been considered inappropriate once upon a time (like women being heard and not just seen) that people recognize was wrong to be inappropriate back then.
I kept my mouth shut as he was scolding me because, quite frankly, I felt shocked and invalidated. Even though he said he understood that I was going through something, I was angry that he would be so dismissive.
I was telling people because it was helping me function. It was helping me work. It was helping me not cry and not shut down. Now that he's scolded me, I've done both. I think he's fortunate that I showed up at all, which I have because she's not dead yet, because I need my bills paid, and because, as a part-time employee, I get only 16 hours (four 4-hour shifts) of bereavement leave.
I did not ask my boss why he deemed my sharing as inappropriate. I don't know if he thinks it makes customers uncomfortable. Quite frankly, I don't care if it does. He said it's personal information that customers don't need to know. Guess what? I think it's my personal information to share given what it is. If I was going through a breakup like I did in November, I wouldn't share. This is a death. And I don't know what else to do to help me not completely break down at work. I think that would be worse.