Today, my anti-work mentality is around how much of our daily lives we are expected to work. Even the average of 5 days a week is far, far too much in my opinion..
There is really stupid term I hear “work vs. life balance” but no one can explain to me how you can balance 5 days vs 2 days on a scale and make it balanced. You cant balance 8 – 10 hours (possible commute) into 3 – 4 hours of personal time if you even have that much. I am exhausted almost all the time. And it has been commented on often so I wont harp on it too much, that even in our 'free time' is often spent just doing chores, errands, cleaning, etc and other responsibilities that are required or not able to do the rest of the time because you are working so much.
When I was in school, I had many friends. I am not trying to brag in any way, I just mean to say that I was a very social person. I also went to a private school with a different schedule routine so I was able to hangout with friends more often. Even outside of school I would go to these friends houses sometimes for multiple days in a week. If I would convince my parents, I would leave school go to Billy's house, sleepover, carpool or take bus to school, then go to Jimmy's house the next night, and maybe swing by another party and so on. I went out a lot and had many interactions, parties, concerts, and genuine social moments with friends and family.
Flash forward to today and after working fulltime almost constantly for 10 years with very little time off. ( I also had a medical issue, went on ShortTerm Disability, but this forced me to used up all my vacation days I had accrued for years at my last job. that day I learned if you go on disability you are forced to use all vacation days ( at least in the US, in state and company I worked in. )
So anyways, I have about 5 friends left that I still talk to. I think mainly because I turned down so many more invitations to hangout and events over the years I couldnt attend because I was working all the time. Or these friends or events would spring up and difficult to plan around – they call me up and say “hey want to go X place and do this?” on a tuesday and me: ” yea I do but I am working right now or have to go home and cook/clean/setup for next work segment in 7 more hours from now”
Like I could drive 1hr 30 min to see a friend, hang out for 1hr and then just have to come home. I COULD do it. and sometimes I did, for the few friends I was able to keep. But that is exhausting and with the amount of friends I had from school, it wasnt really viable to even do that if I wanted to maintain other responsibilities alongside work. I really felt like for my physical health, I had to pick and choose which family and friends that I had the energy to spend time with. Thats kinda messed up right?
I know there is talk of 4day work week push, but I still dont think thats enough… And some are already willing to compromise with making those 4days contain the 10hrs ( i. e. you still working those avg 40hrs just added to your 4 days making longer days.
For some types of jobs, and salaried positions, on call, time sensitive work. I fear this will not be resolved with the 4day work week. I think we need contracts in writing – that worked can fully shut-off all work devices and communications on those other 3days off.
If am being real, I think 2 or 3 days would be healthy work week. I understand thats unrealistic right now, and that perhaps only rich people are able to do this right now.
But if I had to pick what I think is a reasonable amount of Work vs Life balance? it would be completely flipped. 2 or 3 days a week, or 20 hours of work per week I think for me would be a HEALTHY amount of time for the rest my mental health and physical health.
And to be fair, If you love working and have a job you are passionate about. Thats totally fine! I am not saying you shouldnt be allowed to work more than 20hrs. If you love your job, and want to work more (maybe an independent artist/craftsman?) then by all means, you work as many hours as you want to.
My point is about mental health and physical health and becoming anti-social I think was negative for my mental health. As I shut myself in because I am depressed and exhausted all the time from work that I struggle to make time for friends and family.
If I had more free time, I would make an effort to visit friends and family more often. I would also like to volunteer in my community, but I dont have much time for that either.
If I ever get in a position where I can decide how many days or hours one should HAVE to work to survive, I am shooting for the stars. 3 days I am serious.
Sorry for the ranting. I just wish there was an end in sight, and wish I could afford my own home with two median incomes..