So a few years before the pandemic hit, I wound up with a mysterious chronic pain condition and qualified for benefits that were just enough to make it so I didn't have to work at all. Things just sort of fell into the right spot. Since then, the pain condition has gone away.
In 2019, the period of time during which food stamps would be available without work requirements came to an end.
And then the pandemic hit.
Since then the state has been extending the amount of time food stamps would be available without work requirements for obvious reasons, specifically due to the “high unemployment rate” as they say on the site. However, the end of the latest extension is coming in October, and since they haven't released another extension notice by now it's a pretty good chance that they're going to make me find another job again.
I know I won't be able to do much about it except start working again, because this is simply the system we live in, and life sucks, and it sucks by design, etc. etc., but I'm literally dreading this to such an extent that it feels like I'm actually approaching death. How do I deal with having 8 whole years of freedom and now suddenly having to spend most of my time working for the rest of my life? I know it sounds stupid, and I know I sound weak, but at this point it just feels like there's nothing for me to look forward to from this point. I'll almost certainly lose my health insurance, which is an ACA plan that's only available for people making under a certain amount of money, and I'll need to make more than that to cover my expenses.
Then there's me staring down the 'dark future' that all Millennials and younger are staring down, the possibility of having to work multiple jobs just to barely scrape by and never being able to retire as the cost of living increases and increases with no end in sight.
8 years of mostly free time all because of an extremely unusual turn of events, to suddenly endless struggle. I'm trying to type this in a calm and collected manner, but I'm honestly anything but calm. As I've said before, it feels like the world as I know it is about to end and there's nothing I can do about it. How do I cope with having to live like everyone else now?
(Side note: I know how bad this sounds. I know how much this sounds like a spoiled privileged kid having to get their first taste of reality. All I can really say though, is that I'm sorry. I apologize to you all for having it so easy when you're all struggling so much. I understand how fortunate I was to be in the position I've been in the last 8 years, and I know how unfair it was for me to have been living so comfortably while everyone else is struggling. Any bitterness you feel toward me for this is perfectly valid, though I simply ask that you bear in mind that I'm already in a very precarious mental state at the moment, and that the purpose of me creating this thread was to ask for advice on how to cope with this massive change that will affect my entire life, and not an invitation for people to tell me how selfish I've been. I already know. And I did say I'm sorry for not taking the responsibility of class solidarity, but there isn't much I can do now. To those who understand, thank you for your kindness.)