Remote pharma worker here, nearly 2 years in my current role. I’ve been doing less and less every day for nearly a month while maintaining the illusion that I’m getting things done… and no one knows. Every time we have an internal meeting I’ll say I’m doing what needs to be done and we’re making progress, but I just don’t put in the work. Everything is always “urgent” but clearly that isn’t the case. It’s also made me realize my “super important” work doesn’t actually matter. It’s all bitch work. If it was critical, they would know it wasn’t done.
We didn’t get any holiday bonuses or raises this past year. Something about how “profits are down”, yet still in the billions. They used to give merit-based raises during performance evaluations, then switched to a flat rate company-wide, and now I guess it’s a big fat nothing. I’m torn between feelings of guilt over not getting anything done and feelings of resentment over the lack of recognition and incentives. Even when I take the occasional day off I don’t come back with any newfound motivation or sense of purpose. I just don’t care.
Sigh. Sorry to rant like this, I just had to get it off my chest.
Happy Monday, all.