This is a long read and I needed to get it off my chest so buckle up kids.
Tldr; started new job, lots have people have been in my job and keep leaving or getting fired, I think it might be the manager.
So I went for a lax interview and I initially didn’t get the job. It was a really nice interviewer (she left last month due to being made redundant at another office) and I got along with her well but the interview went south when I mentioned my child, she said it’s a fast paced workplace and they prefer to hire people without children because their last member of staff was always calling off work with childcare and sickness issues. I fired back “honestly, my kids leg needs to be falling off or something to get a day off school, his education is the most important and he isn’t sick often, I have a childcare facility in mind who is ready also who is reliable as it’s a company after school club that collects from school, not a family member or partner “ well I know it’s illegal to discriminate but i wasn’t suitable in their eyes at the time and that’s fine, she was honest and she emailed me the next day saying I was unsuccessful and they would keep me in mind for other vacancies, I respected that. A month later I got a call from the ceo, he saw my cv after their chosen one left them in the shit and gave me the job over the phone. I came in, filled the form out and started that following week. Thing that struck me as odd was that I never signed a contract and was told I’m on probation for a few months before I kept or let go and then I’ll get my contract. Which also tied into my anxiety of “are they gonna drop me when I’m on top of their work”
I love it here, I get along well with absolutely everyone except my manager. She is one of those managers that’s always grumpy (her actual nickname amongst the people there), I felt like she hated everyone and she has health conditions too so I didn’t take it too personally at the beginning, she is always shouting at people and is feared by most, she is well known for micro managing. I started training with someone else luckily and I picked it up really quick and was left alone to do my workload after a few days.
I noticed the energy shift after a few weeks, my work was being over looked and every last mistake was being picked up, the smallest things. I don’t mind constructive criticism but it just wasn’t constructive, it came across as always being told off. I soon noticed that some of the mistakes were things I remembered completing and have been thinking “ I’m I going crazy I swear I inputted this I remember this work” I was constantly double checking my work in spare time and was told to “check my work and check again”, I’m a bit of a perfectionist with my work and do things in order and double check as i go along too. I went from over 30 mistakes one week to 4 the following, but when I was told about them, I didn’t get a “well done you went from 30 to 4 that’s a great improvement” I got a “these mistakes need to stop now and you need to pay more attention” some of the mistakes I owned up to because it was mine but I’ve been pulled on mistakes for things I wasn’t even trained on also, bare in mind I have worked here a little over a month. In the grand scheme, I work on roughly 700 pages a week and input them twice.
The constant breathing down my neck has sent my anxiety through the roof, I had to start anti depressants because I couldn’t sleep at night because I’m trying to remember if everything was done correctly, I would travel to work and get anxious that I’m going to get pulled into the office as soon as I get in, i wasn’t sleeping and was late (under a hour) a lot because of it, but would always make up my time and get my work load done. My sleep has been a lot better since mid last week so I’ve been in on time recently, it was pretty terrifying to go in every morning knowing I’m going to have some comments made about it.
Honestly if it’s not mistakes or lateness related there will still be things that get thrown as shade all the time, once I had shade thrown at me because I contacted hr about my contract and payslip and was told I should have gone to my manager, I’ve also had shade thrown about my choice of clothing, it’s a casual dress at my workplace and it was boiling outside and I wore a dress with tights and got pulled for it. I’ve had shade for asking for help and now anything I’m unsure of, I put it to one side and go at the end with everything so I only have to get shaded once.
I honestly thought my manager just hated everyone because of what everyone else was saying about her but I genuinely think she don’t want me there (or anyone in my role) I spoke with other people and they say “the amount of staff in your role they have changed out is crazy, they need to keep one reliable person” the last person had made “so many mistakes, The management was always cleaning up their mess”. Which makes me think, was is changed by the grumpy manager to give grounds to fire? Or at least grounds to bitch? I think the last person ended up leaving rather than getting fired.
The craziest thing has been happening to my work, especially very recently. I’ve noticed it’s been a few times before with small things but I chalked it up to “eh my bad I’m new” but now there’s drastic changes that I found yesterday that took me over an hour to fix. I’ve found things that I know I didn’t do, work been deleted and work being copy and pasted in other places where it shouldn’t be, not one copy, but about 14 copies of info in random places. I know I’m not going crazy but damn it feels like it.
I want to prove that I’m either a. Being sabotaged or b. Need to pay more attention to my work. I can’t download anything on the pc because everyone can see it. Was thinking to make a log everyday of the spreadsheets but that still doesn’t cover the other mistakes being pulled from other places. Was also thinking a screen recorder but with it being on a remote connect idk if it will be detected. All the spreadsheets are password protected so I can’t see the logs on there. Any ideas?